Focus on the Important Things

This past fall and winter have been a great time of change for a lot of us. I mean look at how some of the political, economic and social realities are forcing us to change and adapt. What I think is happening is that these political and socio-economic factors are really getting us to focus on the important things in our lives. We are forced to invest in the areas of our lives that matter most. We must become more careful and intentional about where we spend money and who and where we invest our time and energy with. We must to be less frivolous and think more about getting value and a decent return on our investments of time, energy, money and work.

But you know change doesn’t happen without help along the way.

Personally, I struggle with my weight. One goal I have this year (every year) is to take weight off; a second change was reconfiguring my business plan and concepts; and, the third change was personally adapting to those socio-economic conditions that we’re all facing these days.

So far, I am down 10 pounds…thanks to some dedicated workouts with my personal trainer, Chris. Chris has coached me and pushed me to a point where I am jogging around the gym in between my sets of weights. He even makes me do squats…and I hate squats!

The bottom line is the energy is back, the vitality and the passion…all necessary to run a business these days…and live a vibrant life no matter what you do!

My business is starting to take shape too as the rebranding and new website are oh so close to completion. I have been surrounded by great people helping me along on my journey.

Now study and look at the picture above

because that’s us sometimes. We are like little kids needing a guiding hand and when times are good we are the adult…perhaps leading the way for others. We all need the sage or the spiritual warrior who knows the path and can guide us along the way.

We all need help and as human beings our downfall is that we don’t ask for it. Out of shame maybe? Or God forbid, someone will think we’re weak and not successful. Or sometimes our belief is that no one can do it like we can and we say, “I will do it myself!”

I say park those stories and get some help. Get the help you need. Ask…ask…ask…get the help along the way.

I also get coaching help from Kim and Jacqui at Frame of Mind Coaching around my weight loss issues. The program that Kim and Jacqui designed included weekly coaching calls and journaling daily. It included journaling our thoughts and feelings around a certain weekly discussion point. In week 7 of our 10-week program we had to journal about “gratitude” and I wrote about a time in my life when I had lost my father. I was 10 years old. He died suddenly…the abruptness of it all left my entire family in shock, depression and wonderment…

It left me without a dad…totally not cool…and I felt like an outcast at school and in life…I mean crap, eh? I was the only 10-year-old at school without a dad…

So in writing about gratitude during my 10 week coaching calls Kim reviewed my journal and asked me a critical question about this time in my life. She asked about who my mentors were after my father passed on.

Who were they? I wasn’t sure. I didn’t know who to suggest!

My first thought was that no one was a mentor. It wasn’t my uncles or those closest to me. But then as I wrote my response it became apparent that the people I’d think would be my mentors weren’t. However, two of my cousins, my brother-in-law and a CFL football player were absolutely my mentors. You know it’s odd but when you’re not aware of it, you realize that life supports you totally.

Sometimes if you expect people to show up they don’t and that clouds your vision making it hard to see those that do show up and help you along the way.

So, you’ve got to lose the expectations you have about and around people and just let life unfold. The lesson I got in this time in my life was that life totally supported me through that difficult time.

And now back to the point I was making about getting help along the way. I hope you’ve learned some core lessons.

1. Ask for help if you need it.

2. Lose your expectations (preconceptions) of others.

3. Trust that the universe is taking care of you at all times.

4. Know that the best people will show up if you allow them too.

5. Have an attitude of gratitude.

6. Realize that you’ve got to get out of the way–let your negative thoughts, worries and fears vanish and choose positive ones instead! 

Oh. and that CFL football player, was a Tight End with the Ottawa Rough Riders named Rhome Nixon…he took me under his wing for 4 seasons in a row. He let me in the dressing room after a game, allowed me to be in on the practice field during practices and even invited me to an after the game gathering with other players such as Rudy Sims, Art Green, Art Lester and Condredge Holloway…pretty awesome experiences that have touched me to this day!

So, go ahead ask for help on your journey, you will be surprised by who shows up!

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