We all need a good laugh and what better way to enjoy some laughs than Fun Friday? Kick off your weekend with our list of puns, jokes/one-liners and special aging perks. You’re only as old as you feel and you may as well be laughing as you age! Enjoy!
Puns, Jokes and One-Liners
- I didn’t make it to the gym today. That makes five years in a row.
- When you get a bladder infection, urine trouble.
- I decided to stop calling the bathroom the “John” and renamed it the “Jim”. I feel so much better saying I went to the “Jim” this morning.
- I thought I saw a river, but I was mistaken. I must be getting see nile.
- Last year I joined a support group for procrastinators. We haven’t met yet.
- I used to think I was indecisive, now I’m not so sure.
- The older I get, the earlier it gets late.
- If God wanted me to touch my toes, he would’ve put them on my knees.
- At my age “Getting Lucky” means walking into a room and remembering what I went in there for.
- Age is an issue of mind over matter, if you don’t mind it doesn’t matter.
- Somewhere an elderly lady reads a book on how to use the internet, while a young boy googles how to read a book.
- At my age I don’t want to eat any more health food. I need all the preservatives I can get.
Perks of Aging
- Things that you buy now won’t wear out.
- You no longer think of the speed limit as a challenge.
- Your secrets are safe with your friends because they can’t remember them anyway.
- You can eat dinner at 4:00 in the afternoon.
- There is nothing left anymore to learn the hard way.
- Your joints are more accurate meteorologists than the weather man.
- No one expects you to run ….. anywhere!